Aries: About a year ago, I joined Planet Fitness on York and Aramingo. I only wanted to use their elliptical machines, so at the $10 a month cost, I found it to be a great deal. However, every time I went, every machine was in use already. Shortly after joining, I was spending a lot of time in New York for work. Being that I was charged every month for a membership I was not using, I called to cancel. They told me the only way I could cancel was to go into the location where I joined. I let them know I was in New York, and this wasn’t possible. They told me this was the only way to cancel my membership. So, after a few months of being charged the $10, and the $40 or so processing fee, I finally made it back to Philly to cancel. I was really upset about their policy, and I’ve since told this story to a bunch of people. This morning, I joined Planet Fitness again. Sometimes we try something, and it doesn’t work. Sometimes it makes us upset and angry. But a second chance with a new outlook can really benefit us. Here’s to that beach bod.

Taurus: What is it about a cold and rainy weekend that gets me going, you ask? Well, I liked the pressure being off to do anything outside (although I did enjoy a long Center City walk). I like the sound of the rain beating on my roof and windows. I like the chill that allows me to start a fire in the stove. I cooked a great dinner and, and I felt healthy. Then I totally broke down in a severe state of loneliness. I realized how alone I am so much of the time. And how, although I can enjoy it, it can become hard at times (If I just had this Holland Lop bunny that I want..). I began to ask myself, “when will I get my break?” and “when will I be worthy enough for this world?”  If anyone were ever here, they would most likely enjoy my things, my atmosphere, and maybe even me. Yet, no one is here. It is just me. Taurus, there’s a saying, “wherever you go, there you are”. If you want to make changes happen, you have to get out and make them happen. I, on the other hand, will be wallowing in self deprecation, if you need me.

Gemini: Irish oatmeal, Irish coffee, Irish potatoes, etc. Why? None of these things even come from Ireland, per se. Yet, places like Trader Joe’s sell an Irish Oatmeal, that is no different from Quaker Oats, not even suggested to made another way, and not made or distributed in Ireland. However, attaching the Irish to whatever it is, even if it’s “potatoes” that do not consist of a potato at all, seems exotic enough to some to buy into it. It’s a marketing scam, and it works very well. Gemini, if you’re having trouble getting something off the ground, I suggest you do a bit of research to find out how you can reach the common people with this idea a little bit more. You don’t need to be sneaky by attaching a word to your idea, you could start as small as a party to let people know about it.

Cancer: My friend Justin and I used to be borderline compete with wild ideas of romance and courtship. Even if we didn’t like a person all that much, we would want to impress them anyway. Whether it be scaling a wall to a girl’s room in the middle of the night (and scaring the crap out of her), or placing letters and gifts in a scavenger hunt style; leaving anonymous flowers attached to bikes, parades to your house, etc. We were really over the top. I think for both of us, the person who always appreciated out efforts most was ourself. We never particularly had the same sort of excitement brought back to us. I still make these efforts. Not just with my lovers, but with my friends. Simple little gestures can really make someone’s day, and in turn, my own. Cancer, think of someone you love, and make a grand gesture for them. It’s really little to no effort to do such a thing, and it will make a great feeling within you both.

Leo: I realize as I get older, I become more envious of people. I used to just think I was doing the best I can, and I always felt I was succeeding. Now, I see myself as a failure all too often. I look at others’ lives, and their art careers, and their homes, and their families, and their clean clothes, and their working cars, and their vacation photos, and I want to just give up. I just want to lay down on a cold hard floor and fall asleep. Perhaps if I am sleeping, I could at least dream of me having these things. And maybe I would have one of those dreams that feels so real. It’s hard to feel under appreciated or unloved, but sometimes that’s the card you’re dealt. Leo, if you just keep going on, at least you’ll keep living. And if you believe in living, that do it until you die.

Virgo: I had a Friday night out (for once) with a friend last week. He took me out to Root on Frankford Ave, and we drank a lot of wine, ate delicious food, and had cool conversation. Then, I took him to El Bar, where the size of the vodka soda I ordered took me over the top. The choice of these two places, a fancy and lovely place like Root to the outside packed courtyard full of smokers, was incredibly different, but it was nice that neither of us were judging the other for our preferences (although I would prefer Root any way, I just can’t really afford it). It’s easy to judge people, and we do it often. But, rather than look down upon someone for their choices or actions, sometimes it’s nice to join them. You never know how much you may enjoy something, otherwise.

Libra: Joy: (noun) a feeling of great pleasure and happiness. Where do we find the most joy in our lives? As humans, we feel joy in the company of others and in the success of ourselves. Perhaps other things like a snow blizzard, or a caribbean vacation, or a bouquet of peonies from your lover. Mostly, though, and more commonly, it’s in the company of others and in the success of ourselves. Success, to me, is in the company of others. Joy, in my case, is a combination of the two. Find what it is that brings you joy, Libra. Ponder in the idea of this joy, and get to the root of why. Is this joy attainable? If so, I suggest you start working toward it. Joy is a feeling of great pleasure and happiness, and who wouldn’t want to feel like that?

Scorpio: Sometimes I miss living in Tucson, AZ. I don’t miss the hot weather or the blazing sun, I miss the mountains and the landscape. I miss the big sky and the stars at night and the little adobe houses. It’s a magical little place. I think I miss it mostly, because when I lived there, I seemed to do a lot of little travels, and day trips. Since I have been back in Philly, I haven’t had a vacation really at all. I haven’t had the luxury. If I could do anything today, I would take a road trip with a buddy. Not to any particular place, just a long drive in a car. Yet, I will most likely stay inside. Scorpio, you’re the type of person who gets stuff done. You’re a doer no matter what gets in your way. I am looking to you for guidance on this very day, and I suggest you do what you do best, and let us all follow in your lead.

Sagittarius: What do these no waste people do in the toilet paper situation? It’s not like every household comes equipt with a bidet, and it’s not like they’re cheap to install. Why is living naturally and healthy seemingly a thing for people with money? Even if I wanted to buy recycled or tree-free toilet paper, I can’t afford to. Am I going to get cancer from all the Scott TP I’ve been using my whole life? Class is an awful part of our system. It’s oppressive and sad. Sagittarius, I ask you to take some time to realize what you have, and perhaps see if there is something you can give. Reach out and give a little to someone in need, whether it be a guy begging on the sidewalk or a family member in need. You don’t need everything, but others do need something.

Capricorn: Three of the most important men in my life are Capricorns. One, and possibly the most nurturing of the three is on the cusp of Sagittarius, but I do believe he falls into Capricorn quite well. The other two are incredibly similar beings: hard working, obsessed with their work, consider their time more precious and valuable than anyone else’s; they both seek a spiritual guidance of sorts, but neither of them live so heightened. The third guy, on the other hand, is a constant saving grace from the woes in my emotional state due to the others “giving me” a hard time. I was due to be born in Capricorn, but was late enough to be a full blown Aquarian. Perhaps this is my attraction to the Capricorn. You little beasts of shifting ideas and human flaws would be that much easier for me to deal with if you were to humble the sensibility of your strong willed egos. A human flaw is a beautiful thing that, once recognized within you, can boost your spirituality to new levels. Be the odd Capricorn out sometimes, and be like the beaver who builds the damn, not the one who hides beyond it.

Aquarius: Things I enjoy most: a meaningful hug, a night time breeze, a good hair day, feeling appreciated, and really long drives in a car with a buddy. Lately the good hair day tops the list, although infrequently, for I often have unwashed and greasy hair. I’d like to use one of these good hair days all up, not just working and coming home after only to say to myself, “I wish someone would have appreciated this good hair day with me”. I wish someone were here now to run their fingers through this hair day. I wish so much sometimes that the good hair day was accompanied by the excitement of a decent little road trip with someone who thought I was great enough to give me a meaningful hug. I am pretty hard on myself. I don’t think I deserve more than I have, I just accept what I do not have, and I wonder why all of my hard work paid off to just still trying. We Aquarians are always in search of the next best thing, but not just for ourselves. We can give away the best things to others, and feel the outcome as if it were our own. Lately, I feel as though every time I give away, what is returned to me feels like stones being thrown at the back of my head in the dark. If you’re having a similar life shift, let’s use our collective consciousness to help each other. And let’s be candid here: I need that meaningful hug.

Pisces: Where Matthew saw “on the third day” a time where “He will be raised from the dead”, Roy Wood saw “on the third day” as the perfect time to leave (an all time favorite band of mine) ELO, or Electric Light Orchestra. Two very different ideas of what the third day is going to look like, yet both are pretty epic. Pisces, I recommend that on your third day (from reading this), you find an epic way to behave and move on in a wild new direction, whether that has you feeling like returning from the dead or leaving your bandmates, it’s a step toward a new life. You have been stagnant for too long, little friend. It is your time now to raise up and move on. Do this with a sensitive heart and an open mind, and let these things guide you along the way.