FOMO: Fear Of Missing Out

This is the first in a series of weekly columns where I break down the biggest stories from around the corner to across the globe—just so that you know what’s going on and don’t feel like you’re missing out on anything.

Links to stories are red. Click them to learn more and know what you’re talking about while at the bar or with your in-laws.

Local:

Church in Fishtown May Not Be Demolished after all. 

On Tuesday, the Philadelphia Historical Commission (known from here on out as “the committee”) voted unanimously in support of a recommendation to nominate St. Laurentius Church as a historic site. This means that chances of it being knocked down are getting slimmer and slimmer.

Tacos & Home Invasion

The mastermind behind Paesano’s and Modo Mio, Peter McAndrews, is opening up a new taco joint at that abandoned shack thing at Frankford and Marlborough in Fishtown. Later this month, he’s doing a pop-up tasting at a block party called “that summer jawn.”

Police need your help finding two white men who shot a man for $1, a knife and a cell phone. The home invasion happened in Kensington. The two thugs broke in, shot the man (he’s fine) and made away with nothing valuable.

What’s The Story Behind That New Fishtown Mural? 

If you haven’t noticed, a new mural popped up at Susquehanna and Belgrade in Fishtown last week. The mural was done by street artist Gaia and is about mixing the old and new. We spoke with the artist and the homeowner who commissioned the project to see what it’s all about.

City:

The City And Philadelphia Police Are Back In Hot Water Over Brandon Tate-Brown.

Newly released documents and videos surrounding the murder of Brandon Tate-Brown were released this week. This new evidence provide a different narrative than that of the initial police story of the incident. As part of a civil rights lawsuit filed on behalf of Tate-Brown’s family, the city (kind of) had to release files. The files show that Tate-Brown was not reaching into his car when police shot him twice in the head, as Philadelphia Police Commissioner Charles Ramsey stated earlier this year. The Philadelphia District Attorney’s office chose not to file charges against the two officers and doesn’t seem to want to talk about it right now. Speaking at a TEDx event on Thursday, Commissioner Ramsey blamed the media for the department releasing inaccurate information.

In the time since writing this, there was also another development:

New Evidence: Police told EMS #BrandonTateBrown 'shot at a police officer' & 'was then shot by police' #False pic.twitter.com/LkTIOTmFzJ

— Mildenberg Law Firm (@MildenbergLaw) June 12, 2015

Mayor Nutter Pulls Plug On NAACP Presser That Would Have Alleged Racism By Casino Developer In South Philly.  

Continuing with the administration’s efforts toward (or lack of) transparency, a press conference set to be led by African American leaders to discuss racism by a casino developer was pulled by the Mayor shortly before it was set to begin, according to a source for The Daily News.

#LOLSIXERS Give Middle Finger To Wells Fargo

The Philadelphia 76ers, arguably one of the worst teams in the National Basketball Association, decided to not refer to its home arena as the “Wells Fargo Center,” because the corporate mega-bank won’t give the team any money or sponsorship. The stadium (that was half-empty during most of the team’s games last season) will now be simply be referred as “The Center” by the Sixers organization.

#LOLSIXERS was a hashtag created because the team is just plain bad, finishing 18-64. The folks over at Billy Penn have 29 stories using the hashtag, and you can read them all here, if you’re that bored.

National:

Every Federal Employee’s Social Security Number Allegedly Stolen By Hackers.

According to the union representing  around a million federal employees, hackers were able to obtain social security numbers and other information that people probably wouldn’t want stolen from an un-encrypted database. According to the AP, head democrat Harry Reid said the attack was carried out by “the Chinese.”  The whole thing is kind of a mess and just keeps getting worse and worse. Change your passwords and make sure they don’t suck. 

Video Allegedly Shows Police Raid At Weed Dispensary in Calif., Then They’re Eating Weed And Playing Darts. 

Santa Ana, Calif. — An internal investigation has been launched into allegations that during a police raid on a weed dispensary, officers played darts, ate marijuana, and joked about kicking a disabled woman. An officer can be heard saying, “I was about to kick her in her fucking nub.” An attorney involved in the case told local news outlet, the Voice of OC

“I believe they are consuming edibles and the behavior exhibited gives every indication that’s what they’d be doing.”

Those Two Guys Really Dedicated To Not Being In Jail Any More Had Inside Help With Escape. 

Clinton County District Attorney Andrew Wylie has confirmed that a correctional officer provided the tools to help the two New York inmates who escaped prison earlier this week. The two inmates, one of which who has a very, very large dick, dug an underground tunnel out of their life sentences for murder and other related offenses. While it is believed they are somewhere in rural New England, as of writing this piece, police have no idea where the two escapees are. One thing is for certain, though: They were not in a Philadelphia cab this week. 

World:

Four Tourist Who Got Naked In Malaysia To Be Deported After Paying $1330 Fine. 

Travel Tip: Don’t go to sacred mountain and get naked.

Last month, ten tourist got naked and took photos on top of a mountain designated as a UNSECO World Heritage Site, and four of them were arrested for it. The others managed to get out of the country before police were able to make an arrest. The four who managed to not elude authorities are now being deported back to their homelands after serving a few days in jail and paying a fine.

U.S. May Start Building More Military Hubs In Iraq To Combat Islamic State. 

Following the deployment of 450 more U.S. troops to Iraq’s Sunni region, which adds to the 3100-troop military presence in the country, the Obama Administration announced they are looking into building more military hubs to help combat the rapidly growing ISIS. Army General Martin Dempsey told reporters

“our campaign is built upon establishing these ‘lily pads,’ if you will, that allow us to continue to encourage the Iraqi security forces forward.”

Israel Forgives Itself After Killing Four Palestinian Kids Last Year.

The Israeli Military has said it is not responsible for an attack last year that left four Palestinian children dead, calling the attack an accident. However, journalists who were present at the scene offered a very different account.