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New to the Riverwards: Sleepy Drivers and Late Saturday Night Observations


2:15 AM, Saturday night. Kensington.

I was enjoying one of those slow, quiet conversations that crop up among party stragglers as we finish off the last few bottles of cider. We were discussing dogs, I think, and how often they have to be given baths, when we were rudely interrupted by blaring car horns.

It was late and we were in a residential area not known for being traffic heavy, so, of course, we all looked out the window. Normally there wouldn’t be anyone on the road and certainly no one would need to honk.

We saw a car stopped at the corner with a line of other vehicles behind it. The car was running, headlights on. Other drivers have gotten out of their cars to investigate. One short, stocky man was using his cell phone to illuminate the driver’s seat as others watched.

The driver was slumped over, asleep. Or passed out, maybe. It wasn’t clear to us because we were inside across the street, but the stocky man tried to wake the driver, and the driver wasn’t responding. The bright light of a cell phone screen didn’t rouse him, either, so I started to think that the driver probably wasn’t asleep but was almost certainly passed out from some kind of intoxicant use. Or dead, maybe, but that was a little too frightening to really consider.

More cars lined up behind the stopped car as other drivers made phone calls. A few of us at the party decide to call 911 thinking that this whole situation is so bizarre that maybe it’s time to bring in the professionals.

Then, as quickly as this whole thing started, the driver springs upright, gives a little wave, and drives away.

What the … ? Sometimes a driver just needs to pass out for a minute before continuing on to his destination, I guess.

I love Philadelphia. I’ve lived in a lot of neighborhoods since I moved here five years ago, but the craziest things I’ve seen in Philadelphia have been here in the Riverwards. These neighborhoods are among the most diverse, interesting and uniquely-Philly places in the city.

Even more fascinating is the juxtaposition of events like this passed-out driver just waking up and driving away up against the backdrop of comic book store/coffee shops, half-million dollar row homes, and reasonably-priced antiques stores.

I suppose this is gentrification in action. Young, relatively affluent people like myself are moving in, demanding both affordable housing and cucumber dill ice cream. But that’s not all that’s here. There’s also deep poverty, open substance use and lack of access to affordable, quality health care.

Who knows — maybe the driver didn’t live in the Riverwards. Maybe he was on his way to Rittenhouse or Queen Village or Jersey (we all know how awful Jersey drivers can be). But seeing him unconscious in his car reminded me that this area is changing and needs investment not only in real estate and quirky cafes, but in the people who live here.

Teagan Kuruna is a writer, podcaster, and public health obsessive who lives in the Riverwards with her husband and overly affectionate cat. Read more of her work at teagank.com and talk with her on Twitter @TeaganMPH.

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