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Spirit Astrology: Your Weekly Dose of Hyperlocal Spiritual Advice (February 15, 2017)


  Aries: During a recent trip to West Philly, I stopped in Fu-Wah for what’s known out there as a tofu hoagie, elsewhere known as the Bahn Mi sandwich. Fu-Wah seems to remain my favorite in the city. I’d say I have been getting the tofu hoagie from Fu-Wah for over 10 years, and I have yet to feel even slightly disappointed. However, I almost swear by this particular sandwich from this particular place so much that I have trouble trying other places. It makes me feel stagnant sometimes, or closed-minded. I now make a vow to eat more Bahn Mi’s from Streetside on Girard; however, I will order them as tofu hoagies. Aries, I think it’s time for you to take a similar step in your life. Open up a bit more to something you feel closed off to, but go ahead and do it slowly, at your own pace. This way, if you need to go back to your original opinion, at least you will know you were open-minded getting there, and also, right!

  Taurus: Do you believe that there is another being just like you, if not exactly you, somewhere else in some other solar system? Maybe even multiple in multiple solar systems? Perhaps lately you’re feeling like these other versions of you are interfering with the “you” that you feel most comfortable with? I say, don’t sweat it. Let them in; see what they’re up to. Perhaps their visions are different, and they can teach you new ways to see things. You’ve been taking this winter season too hard. Open up to it, enjoy the snow days or the chill in the air. Take time to sit by a fire, or sleep under some extra blankets. Cozy up with a loved one or a good book. Stay inside and create something new. There are so many versions of you right here, and they all want to be alive. So let spring Taurus out this winter!

  Gemini: There is a song by Talking Heads called “Heaven” in which David Byrne explains that Heaven is a place where nothing ever happens. This has been a longtime favorite song of mine, and David Byrne a longtime hero of mine. Yet a place where nothing ever happens sounds like Hell to me. I’m not one who lives in the city and dreams of the country. I like the city. I like constant stimulation and a place where something is always happening. Think about what your Heaven would be like, Gemini, and create some beautiful way of describing it. Do this so well that other people will believe in your version of Heaven with you.

  Cancer: One night recently, while slightly inebriated, I grabbed a $5 medium pizza from Aramingo’s Best on my way home. I hadn’t eaten much that day, and though I didn’t mind it, I don’t like to wake up hungry. I took the pizza home and ate three slices. It was hot, fresh and delicious! Although it might just be Aramingo’s “best”, I now feel the need to find out. However, I have my hands full with so many other projects right now, I simply do not have the time for another. The Cancer, keeping busy with projects, sometimes just has to suspend one or forget it entirely. It’s a good thing to do, so that you can focus on the projects you are already working on now, making their outcome guaranteed to seem loved and cared for. All the while, just eat the pizza you know you like.

  Leo: Women are strange. We wear uncomfortable shoes, clothes that don’t fit and scents that bother almost everyone but ourselves. A long time ago, one of my best guy friends began to complain about the scent his girlfriend had started wearing. It would make him feel borderline sick to his stomach. He asked me to take him to some places to find an oil that he preferred, and his idea was to get this for her, as a gift, to see if maybe she would change her ways. Clearly, this didn’t go over well, because he never otherwise bought her gifts, making the reason behind this clear. Instead of being open, I remember her feeling offended, as if he told her she had suddenly become ugly. Yet this was not personal at all. If someone comes to you with a hidden agenda, Leo, be sure to look at it from every angle. It may be mostly to the benefit of this person, but perhaps to you and the world around you as well.

  Virgo: Sometimes it’s good to check the weather before you make plans, because although one day may be 66 degrees, the very next day, you could wake to snow and wind. Or, if you’re anything like me, you check the weather on your computer, and mess your plans all up, because you get stuck watching all of the videos on the weather channel website. Be sure to keep your days clear for some new plans, and be sure not to distract yourself beforehand. Upcoming plans can really benefit you, if you let them. Even if you want to distract yourself, or if you want to cancel plans, make sure you follow through. You’re one to take control of your time, but be open to allowing others to make suggestions or offer ideas. The new you is ready to meet current you, and you’re going to be best friends.

  Libra: In the mid-2000’s, there was a company called Cereality, which came to Philadelphia. It was located on Penn’s campus and offered you various kinds of cereals, milks and toppings. Targeted to college crowds throughout the country, only one exists now in the Dallas-Fort Worth airport. It seemed like a good idea, and a real moneymaker, but just didn’t make it. Take this business plan into consideration, Libra. If you’re feeling like you’ve got some great idea, think about it a little bit more before executing it. In this example, the reality is that college kids are hungover and want greasy eggs and bacon, not cereal topped with marshmallows getting soggy in some skim milk. You really need to take into consideration the reality of your idea, and change it accordingly to the people it will affect.

   Scorpio: When I was very young, I had a friend who lived in the house next door to me named Unchin. She was Chinese and spoke little to no English. At five years old, we would just walk around the neighborhood eating popcorn that my mother would pop for us and place into little sandwich baggies. Once, she communicated to me that she lived on the clouds. At least, that’s how I remember it. I remember, at the time, believing her. She was my best friend. Why would she lie to me? Though we spent many days together, I no longer have many more memories of her outside of our popcorn walks and her cloud living. She moved away when I was about six, and a new girl moved in who also became my best friend. Years later, in my younger 30s, I met another best friend, this one fluent in English, and we ate a lot of popcorn together, too. She taught me about popcorn lung and we laughed and laughed and loved each other very much. She still lives nearby, but moved away from my heart recently. Is it the popcorn? Should I never share popcorn with a friend again? Scorpio, if superstition rules your life, you’ll be too cautious. Never be too cautious, always be open. Keep sharing popcorn, and you’ll find a keeper this way.

  Sagittarius: Sometimes what appears clear to you is actually fuzzy if you look at it closer. This may be the case for you lately, Sagi. Perhaps there is a part of your life that you are looking at the only way you want to see it, or the only way you choose to. Yet if you look into it a little bit closer, you may realize that the way you’re looking at it is actually all off. You may even be affecting others in your life having this view, maybe even someone very close to you. As the Sagittarius is often known to be righteous in their ways, sometimes it’s best to turn the light on in the dark, or else you’re just assuming what’s inside. And you know what they say about what happens when you assume? You make an ass out of u and me. Look at the big picture, not just your own created little picture. Don’t be a jackass of all trades; simply be a jack of all trades. Especially including the trades of compassion and love.

  Capricorn: In the current days of my baby craze, I have decided maybe I just need a bunny. I’d love a Holland Lop Rabbit that I can name and hold and treat like my own. I would like to watch its little nose do what it does. I would like to share my vegetables with my little bunny. I want to raise it and be good to it, as I would if only this life’s plan were for me to have the family of my dreams. Capricorn, if you are feeling like there is something you have always wanted, and if you’re suffering from the realizations and regret of not having this, for the choices you made took you along another path, perhaps you, too, should find ways to feel grateful for what you do have, and just change the goals, keeping to feeling as good as you can.

  Aquarius: A fellow Aquarian friend of mine, Bradford Trojan, recently came up with a great new T-shirt idea. He drew a big jar, which contained inside of it a SCOBY for making kombucha, otherwise known as the Mother. The top of the shirt reads “MILF”, and across the bottom, “Mother I’d Like To Ferment”. A silly idea, executed so perfectly, is a now a shirt worn by many. Aquarians often doubt their success, and keep it in their dreams instead. It’s time we get together and change this. Line up with one another across our Universe, and spread the positive energy to move forward as not just thinkers but doers. The next time you’ve got a great idea, at least start by writing it down. Go back to it and make a blueprint. Then go back again and begin the project. Success is yours if you want it.

  Pisces: I recently listened to a Radiolab episode entitled “Smile My Ass”. It’s an episode about the creator of Candid Camera, Allen Funt, which ends with a story about a plane ride he took which was hijacked. During the hijacking, another passenger recognized Funt, and began convincing everyone on the plane that they were on Candid Camera, and that the hijack was therefore a joke. Funt tries to let the passengers know that this is not the case, yet they continue to ask for his autograph, etc. Finally, the plane lands in another location, and the passengers realize the hijack was real, now blaming Funt somehow. A funny episode, no less. If you’re being wrongly accused lately, or feel as if you are, take it in stride. It may seem frustrating now, but the story you’ll have in the future is totally worth it now.

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